I took Ella to the Crystal Ballroom free-for-all Sunday, thinking that she might like the music, and if not, she'd at least get a balloon. To be clear: Ella loves music, just not my music. She listens to Justin Roberts, They Might Be Giants, Harmonica Pocket and most recently the soundtrack to the old school version of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. What I really wanted her to see on Sunday was the first band, a trio from the Rock and Roll Girls Camp. Ella, wearing her balloon butterfly wings, jumped around on the Crystal's bouncy wood floor. My daughters will have a choice in their future. She can choose their preferred activities, with one exception: Rock and Roll Girls Camp is mandatory. I'm only slightly kidding.

Unfortunately, Ella was the only real active audience member during the Girls Camp group. Ella then danced to the next band, Still Pending, a pre-pubescent version of Greenday, until jumping up into my arms to watch the rest of the show. She didn't focus completely on the music all the time but she and Mauren (after joining us after her nap) watched two marimba bands and a female bluegrass trio. When it was time to go, Ella was exhausted, but didn't want to go. She wanted to stay and listen to the Garcia Birthday Band and threw a minor fit. Ella has a hard time making it through dinner, yet somehow she managed to stay alert during 15-minute Dead jams -- something I cannot do.

After the kids and Sonya went home, I stuck around for Greensky Bluegrass, Blue Giant and Blitzen Trapper. I celebrated my evening of independence by promptly falling asleep in the balcony during Greensky Bluegrass. As noted in my last post, staying awake at shows is an ongoing issue. I'd wake up every time the audience clapped during Greensky, but after their set, I zoned out completely, only to wake up to suddenly notice that Blue Giant had come out on stage. So really, there were two small victories today: Ella rocking out and my staying awake during Blue Giant while sitting down. I stood up for Blitzen Trapper and I was well rested thanks to my Greensky snooze. That may end up being a winning formula: fall asleep during the opener and then perk up just in time to make it through the main event.

Rock and roll will save your soul -- if you can stay awake

Once the kids are in bed and I manage to get out of the house to go to a show, I'm not home free. If the show is at the Holocene, I'm OK because I have to stand. If the show is at the Crystal Ballroom and I'm on the floor, I'm OK because I have to stand. If the show is at Berbati's, I'm OK because I have to stand. The Aladdin is another story. I saw three shows at the seated Aladdin in October and November and I fell asleep during all of them at some point. Yael Naim is mellow, so maybe that's understandable, but I also fell asleep during Dengue Fever and Yeasayer -- hardly musical sedatives.

Sure, I'm tired from working and parenting and going out after 9 like I'm still 21 is probably not a great idea. I don't blame that. I once fell asleep when I was out with friends at what used to be North By Northwest (now Music Fest NW). I was sitting at a table and at one point I drifted off and slumped onto the table. I was completely sober and I didn't have any kids at the time. I also fell asleep watching "The Fugitive" and I was 21. Not to mention that it's, you know, one of those edge-of-your-seat thrillers.

So, of course, I blame my dad. He could -- and still can -- fall asleep anywhere. We were once watching the NCAA tournament together in the Hoosier Dome in Indianapolis. There were 30,000-plus people around us cheering and Dad put his head in his hands and fell asleep immediately. Add my genes that to a seat and a full day of work and parenting and the only thing rock and rolling is my weary head as I'm trying to stay awake. After my string of Aladdin snoozers, I went to the Doug Fir to see Thao and The Get Down Stay Down and was waiting for my party to show up. I went back to sit at the bar and fell asleep sitting straight up on the bar stool. At the Crystal Ballroom balcony back in October, I went to sit in the balcony for a show and fell asleep between acts. I finally moved down to the floor for Mates of State and Santogold.

I love the music. That's why I show up. I don't have the energy to dress well. Or to order a martini. Or to dance well. Say what you will, but being a dork takes less energy. And I need all the energy I can just to stay awake.

The kids love me but not my music

This is my status with my daughters:

*We were in the car once a few months back when Ella, my 4-year old, asked to listen to her music, which is usually Justin Roberts.
"Just a minute, sweetie," I said. "We're going to listen to my music until this song is over."
"But nobody likes your music, Daddy."

*A few weeks later, Ella and I were in the kitchen cooking dinner. I went over to the computer to change songs.
"What are you doing daddy?" Ella asked.
"I'm changing songs."
"Why?"
"That was kind of a weird song."
"Why do you like weird songs so much? Why do you like weird things so much?"
I just laughed. I had no answer.

*A few weeks later, our 2-year-old, Mauren, was with me in kitchen. Mauren was my rock and roll hope. She listened to anything. She was bobbing to Blitzen Trapper until all of the sudden "Furr" came on. This is one of the catchiest songs of the year and she said "I don't like this song." I tried to change her mind but she made me turn it off.